I can say I like pretty things
By pretty I mean cute things that can make your heart flutter

I like personal songs, yearning one, with instruments that fill up my whole head

I like my own time, listing what I like at the moment

I like to see people smiling by small kind gestures. As simple as saying "Have a nice day to the baristas", saying "Hi selamat sore pak" to the security guard of the restaurant next door

I like when old songs randomly played and all the rush of feeling, rush of moments back then when I liked that song suddenly coming flooding in. It was as if my heart filled with cold fresh breeze, that I can only see how precious those moments were.

I like tidying up my emails and finding out old email exchange with old friend.

I like to talk about things that I like to my friend. Like, I have to tell them right away, at that very second of the moment arrived

I would like to always be able to breathe this fresh cold air, spend my time on my own pace, being safe and secure in the middle of familiar chaotic coffeeshop. How beautiful it is, to feel safe sitting in between strangers, killing time, listening to music and doing whatever I want, without caring what I want in the future, what bad experience that I had, just now, I like being in my seat writing right now.

I completely understand people are struggling and cooped up with their own problem in their own corner. I don't want to be a bother for other people. But on the outside, they look peaceful, on their own phone. I hope everything is going well with them. I hope they can enjoy their drink tastefully, I hope whatever they're doing on their phone is something that make them happy. I wish them the best.

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I don't know whether in the future I will be able to recall what I do and what I feel right now. Doing this is an absolute fun, to get my phone down and to finally write down what's inside my head. It's like thinking out loud but documented. I cannot always do this because of so many reasons, like I need to do this in an exact time and exact moment, so when people say journaling only take 5 minutes and csn be quick, for me it does not work that way, because I need my time to really feel. I cannot just say today was hard, everyday is hard, everyday is struggle, that I cannot find my real me in my daily life. But, I don't even know myself in my leisure time, who Am I kidding.