Going all places, spending my pocket money for someones happiness is life goals. Even though i'm broke, even though i'm left behind, and there are whole lots of 'even though', but but but i can't resist to be touched myself when ones achieving one checkpoint in their life and to be a part of their achievement is a pride for me, having the same journey as a good friend, having a good memories on their best day. They will remember their best day for the rest of their life, and so will i.
So, this is an open letter for BrilKeLar
Hi oldies congratulation on your degree yaaa, soon enough you'll take off to do community service, eh? (Kkn), and i'll be having graduation, and will be separated wkwkwkwkwk sooo sooo sooo, so this is for you ke.
I'm not so sure when we first met when we both knew each other, i'm not so sure why we're destined to be side by side walking, running, talking, singing, gossiping, arguing, debating, jumping, falling, climbing, building our life together. But since that time you've helped me like A LOT LOT LOT LOT LOT LOT, i can't remember every details but i'll take this opportunity to thank you infinitely and uncountably because whatever i did whatever happened you remained to be there. There. For all the sacrifices you made, for all the whole time i took from you, for every heartache i caused, i'm so so so sorry from the very deepest of my bronchus, lung, heart, and kidney. I, you, we never know what will happen in the future, but i wish you the whole world to be a successful woman, kind wife, incredible mom and on top of that still being my friendest friend for the rest of your life. Wikikikikik, bye.
If you read this please don't ever mention it in our real life, can't stand the awkwardness.
karena tahun ini tahun terakhir saya kuliah (aamiin) dan ini adalah semester ketika saya melepas semua kesibukan selain tugas kuliah. Doa saya untuk 3 lembaga yang telah menampung saya sejak 3 tahun terakhir.
BEM KMFT UGM
hai BEM, aku dulu milih kamu demi ngga jadi mahasiswa kupu - kupu, aku dulu milih kamu karena melihat ketua BEM orasi pas PPSMB itu keren, aku dulu milih kamu karena kakak pemanduku juga milih kamu. Maafin aku dulu sempet bosen sama kamu, maafin aku sering ngilang dengan berbagai alasan dan maafin aku pernah hampir bubarin kamu, tapi demi apapun itu demi kebaikan kamu, demi kamu yang jujur terbuka dan ngga arogan, ngga eksklusif dan ngga gerak sendiri.
untuk itulah aku berdoa buat kamu. siapapun nanti yang gantiin teman superhero aku, M. Hibatur Rahman, siapapun dia, semoga perjuangan teman superheroku ini tetap dijunjung tinggi, kesatuan teknik tetap terjaga, sekre KMFT untuk semua, ketua lembaga satu pikiran, integrasi kerja satu sama lain tetap terjaga, publikasi berjalan lancar, ngga ada tawur antar suporter km/hm, ngga ada protes protes ke BEM lagi, ngga ada #saveOase lagi karena aku harap semoga kita semua bisa tambah saling dewasa dan bisa nyelesein masalah dengan kepala dingin.
sekali lagi siapapun yang gantiin teman superhero aku, plis jangan putus perjuangan dia.
PAMIY
hai PAMIY, kamu adalah kesalahan aku di saat saat tertentu. Dulu bahkan aku underestimate kamu karena dulu yang ngajakin gabung ke kamu bukan kakak angkatan yang cukup hits buat jadi panutan. Tapi walaupun mereka ngga hits, mereka berhasil narik aku. Kali pertama aku official jadi bagian dari kamu, aku ditawari jadi calon pejabat tertinggi, tapi apalah, saat itu aku hanya tumbal untuk menggenapi jumlah calon, jadi tumbal biar ada calon dari ugm, jadi tumbal biar bergejolak, jadi tumbal biar ada yang cantik. Secara struktural dan fungsional kamu kacau, double job di mana mana, anggota ilang ilangan, koordinasi ngga jelas dsb dst. Tapi tanpa kamu, seorang Nida' ngga akan nekat keliling 7 univ di jogja dari ujung pasar ngasem sampek ujung jakal dalam waktu kurang dari 2 jam. Tanpa kamu, aku ngga pernah kenal siapa Agant yang pernah punya pengen masuk ugm, siapa kribo yang ternyata preman genius, siapa siho yang... emang ngga jelas, siapa reja yang rutin gonta ganti pacar, siapa milan yang pinter gitar, siapa zainal anak papua muka jawa, siapa bondan si petualang, siapa faiz onta, siapa dina emak emak bawel, siapa eno cantik yang ngga bisa begadang, siapa ikram aktivis yang kuliah ngga kelar kelar, siapa wazid yang allahuakbar kalemnya, siapa dinar mendes kw super, siapa yogo beruang kutub, siapa caca cantik, siapa alfa, siapa gondo taufiq sama cahyo bocah bocah ajaib, siapa abrar, siapa yelmi, siapa dera, siapa bejo dan yang lain yang ngga bisa disebutin satu satu. Next time we meet again, aku harap kmu udah ngga semenderita dulu, ngga seberantakan dulu, tapi lebih kekeluargaan dari dulu.
KMTA
[Kosong, belum sempet ngelanjutin]
God, please tell my mom to stay strong, tell her to stay healthy, tell her to get enough rest, tell her You will help her get through anything, telk her her daughter gonna be a great person, tell her her son gonna be an awesome one, tell her i'm doing fine, tell her i will make her the happiest mother in the world, tell her i have a lot of friend, tell her i'm trying to be a nice person to everybody, tell her i know a lot of people, tell her i've been having so much fun, tell her i'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass, tell her i love her so much, tell her i wanna go home.
You're finally cracked up today, both. Your anger and your tears.
The monologue behind your head keep repeating itself you've failed this time. You completely lose it.
They say you have to hold on, they say they have your back, they say it's gonna be just fine. Who are they kidding?
You're not allowed to lose it, you have to bear it. Just like anybody else thought who you are, then be it, please anyone. Even if you just have one leg you need to stand up, even if you just have one ear you need to listen up, even if you just have one eye you need to see. Tell yourself you're not allowed to complain, tell yourself you're not allowed to get tired, nobody give a damn about what you've been through, nobody will simphatize you if you act so weak, nobody doesn't really care when you're bleeding, so get a grip and save yourself.
Get yourself together, your life is too good to be frowning.
Kadang pengen berbagi sama semua orang tentang hari. Kemarin, hari ini dan besok.
Tentang siapa aja yang ditemui, kemana aja, kapan.
Tentang kekangenan untuk sebagian orang dan beberapa hal.
Tentang mimpi mimpi aneh yang singgah tadi malam.
Tentang jokes sederhana yang lucunya luar biasa.
Tentang sunset yang selalu terbelakangi ketika di jembatan layang.
Tentang spontanitas mampir di kampus kedua setelah kampus sendiri.
Tentang hidup sehari ini yang ditutup dengan selamat tinggal yang cantik.
Tapi cara pandang orang berbeda, itu yang membatasi kita untuk berbagi. Sebagian orang menganggap kamu sok sibuk, sebagian lagi menganggap kamu luar biasa, sebagian lagi tak peduli dengan kehidupanmu, sebagian lain bahkan tak terbersit menanyakan keadaanmu.
Bukan minta diperhatikan atau minta dikasihani. Kadang hanya ingin berbagi betapa serunya hari ini.
Frankly, i don't even know why people love rain that goddamn much.
The picture of dark clouds is the most terrifying beginning.
The sound of those amounts of water is the sign of 'now anything's gonna be worse'.
The chilly wind get your guts lessen.
The wet pavement's ready to eat you up.
And in the end the mistical smell of the ground is just like a funeral parade.
I don't hate rain, but i don't like it either.
But instead of being alone in a crowd, i'd rather jump in the rain and being scared.
Bye.
I'm not those extreme feminist who defend nudist and blame rapist.
But i'm a part of those who believe if a man can be an astronaut then a woman can be so, if a man can rule then a woman can do so.
And that dream to be one of a kind, to be an example for the other, to be one who rise among the other gender, will still be placed right here whether it is seen or not.
Happy new year and happy birthday :)
